Hot Female Body Photos: The Perfect Female Body Hot Sexy Wallpapers Hot Images Pics Free 2013

Saturday, 23 November 2013

The Perfect Female Body Hot Sexy Wallpapers Hot Images Pics Free 2013

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Woman Jokes - One Liners
    At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, 'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?' The other replied, 'Yes, I am, I married the wrong man.'
    My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.
    After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, 'You know, I was a fool when I married you.' The husband replied, 'Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice.'
    'I never know how much of what I say is true.' Bette Midler
    A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted' . Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'
    When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
    The only thing worse than a man you can't control is a man you can. Margo Kaufman
    Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
    There is no reciprocity. Men love women, women love children, children love hamsters. Alice Thomas Ellis
    'It's the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time.' Tallulah Bankhead
Note:
Guy is happily married to Pauline, and Will happily married to Stephanie. We consider ourselves gentlemen. In the 'old days' we found some women jokes, and many blonde jokes, in poor taste. However, we consider that political correctness pendulum has swung too far the other way, and we are in danger of missing out on a rich seam of humour because the politically correct bandwagon seeks to ban all women jokes. Will and Guy continue to tread the middle ground where we will publish women jokes that we think are funny, but not offensive.
If you take political correctness to its logical conclusion, men would want to ban 'man' jokes like the following Rita Rudner quip, however, Will and Guy can laugh along with Rita without any thought of taking offence.
My mother buried three husbands, and two of them were just napping. Rita Rudner
Some Marriage Math(s):
    Smart man + smart woman = romance
    Smart man + dumb woman = pregnancy
    Dumb man + smart woman = affair
    Dumb man + dumb woman = marriage
    Smart boss + smart employee = profit
    Smart boss + dumb employee = production
    Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
    Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
Some Psychology
Aman will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
Girl Gets Great Guy System
Iris, my sister-in-law, is a long distance lorry driver. She decided to get a dog for protection for the long days and nights that she was away from home. As she studied a likely candidate, the breeder told her, 'I must warn you that he doesn't like men.'
'Perfect', Iris thought and promptly bought the dog.
Some time later as she was leaving a transport café, two men approached her, in the car park, and Iris watched to see how her new 'bodyguard' would react. It soon became clear that the breeder hadn't been joking, because as the men got closer, the dog ran under the nearest car and hid.
Marriage AdviceHow being a parent can change your life
    A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
    A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
    To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
    To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot & not try to understand her at all.
    Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
    Any married man should forget his mistakes, there's no use in two people remembering the same thing.
    Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
    Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
    A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
    A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
    A woman has the last word in any argument.
    Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
    There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman - before marriage and after marriage.
    My opinions are my wife's, and she says I'm lucky to have them.
How Being a Parent Can Change Your Life: How being a parent can change your life
When a baby is born into a family it affects every one in that family. However, as you have baby 2 ... then baby 3, the way in which you deal with the child also changes considerably. Read these suggested differences and enjoy a laugh with Will and Guy.
Your Baby's Clothing:
1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your pregnancy is confirmed.
2nd baby: You wear your ordinary clothes for as long as you are able.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes are your ordinary clothes.
Getting Ready for the Day of the Birth:Getting ready for the day of the birth
1st baby: You practice your breathing as often as possible
2nd baby: You don't bother practicing your breathing because you remember that last time, breathing didn't help at all.
3rd baby: You accept an epidural injection as soon as it is offered.

The Perfect Female Body Hot Sexy Wallpapers Hot Images Pics Free 2013