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After about 20 years of marriage, I'm finally starting to scratch the surface of that one. And I think the answer lies somewhere between conversation and chocolate. ~Mel Gibson, about what women want
Women who make men talk better than they are accustomed to are always popular. ~E.V. Lucas
I'm not against half naked girls - not as often as I'd like to be. ~Benny Hill
A man is as good as he has to be, and a woman is as bad as she dares. ~Elbert Hubbard
You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment. ~Dave Barry, "Things That It Took Me 50 Years to Learn"
The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve them. ~Robert Graves
What men desire is a virgin who is a whore. ~Edward Dahlbert
Women are afraid of mice and of murder, and of very little in between. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
A woman should be an illusion. ~Ian Fleming
There are three things men can do with women: love them, suffer for them, or turn them into literature. ~Stephen Stills
It is because of men that women dislike one another. ~Jean de La Bruyère, Characters, 1688
Behind every great woman is a guy looking at her ass. ~Author Unknown
Look like a girl, act like a lady, think like a man and work like a dog. ~Caroline K. Simon
If you are ever in doubt as to whether to kiss a pretty girl, always give her the benefit of the doubt. ~Thomas Carlyle
Women who feel naked without their lipstick are well over thirty. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
Women are like dogs really. They love like dogs, a little insistently. And they like to fetch and carry and come back wistfully after hard words, and learn rather easily to carry a basket. ~Mary Roberts Rinehart
It's simple. Women only nag when they feel unappreciated. ~Louis de Bernières, Captain Corelli's Mandolin
It's the good girls who keep the diaries; the bad girls never have the time. ~Tallulah Bankhead
Women are beautiful, and yummy. ~A.C. Van Cherub
Women are most fascinating between the ages of thirty-five and forty, after they have won a few races and know how to pace themselves. Since few women ever pass forty, maximum fascination can continue indefinitely. ~Christian Dior, Collier's, June 10, 1955
A husband only worries about a particular Other Man; a wife distrusts her whole species. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
A woman who cannot be ugly is not beautiful. ~Karl Kraus
A man chases a woman until she catches him. ~American Proverb
Variability is one of the virtues of a woman. It avoids the crude requirement of polygamy. So long as you have one good wife you are sure to have a spiritual harem. ~G.K. Chesterton, Alarms and Discursions, "The Glory of Grey"
Beauty is the first present Nature gives to women, and the first it takes away. ~Méré
There's just something about letting a girl have her way with you. ~A.C. Van Cherub
Usually the woman has an appointment with destiny, and the man just happens to be there. ~Robert Brault,
Brains are an asset, if you hide them. ~Mae West
With men, as with women, the main struggle is between vanity and comfort; but with men, comfort often wins. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
Once a woman has given you her heart, you can never get rid of the rest of her. ~John Vanbrugh, The Relapse, 1696
Is it too much to ask that women be spared the daily struggle for superhuman beauty in order to offer it to the caresses of a subhumanly ugly mate? ~Germaine Greer, The Female Eunuch, 1970
A woman can look both moral and exciting... if she also looks as if it was quite a struggle. ~Edna Ferber
Women have very little idea of how much men hate them. ~Germaine Greer
Do you not know I am a woman? when I think, I must speak. ~William Shakespeare, As You Like It
Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football. ~Fran Lebowitz
You're booty-blinded. You know what that is? It's like being snow-blinded only it ain't no snow, it's a cute little piece of ass. ~From the movie I Spy
Women are never landlocked: they're always mere minutes away from the briny deep of tears. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
To get to a woman's heart, a man must first use his own. ~Mike Dobbertin, quoted in A 5th Portion of Chicken Soup for the Soul
Through sources, we have obtained the following alien assessment of the human species: The male wants to be valued for what he pretends to be. The female wants to be overvalued for what she truly is. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
Woman's virtue is man's greatest invention. ~Cornelia Otis Skinner, attributed
Nature has given women so much power that the law has very wisely given them little. ~Samuel Johnson
Women speak two languages - one of which is verbal. ~William Shakespeare
Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more. ~James Thurber
I hate women because they always know where things are. ~Voltaire
Good-looking girls break hearts, and goodhearted girls mend them. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
Fighting is essentially a masculine idea; a woman's weapon is her tongue. ~Hermione Gingold
The people I'm furious with are the women's liberationists. They keep getting up on soapboxes and proclaiming women are brighter than men. That's true, but it should be kept quiet or it ruins the whole racket. ~Anita Loos, New York Times, 10 February 1974
Women always worry about the things that men forget; men always worry about the things women remember. ~Author Unknown
No matter how happily a woman may be married, it always pleases her to discover that there is a nice man who wishes that she were not. ~H.L. Mencken
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